I am very sorry you are having a difficult time of it today.

First, no more relationship talks!!!! If he brings it up, you can respond or say that you need time to think about whatever he wants to discuss...but you...don't initiate them!

Second if you sent the email this morning to apologize, then let it be. It looks like you are pursuing him and putting pressure on him even if that is not your intent.

You contact him only if it's an emergency or something to do w/the kids...nothing more. The more you push for answers and commitment, the more he's going to pull away.

If he doesn't respond to your email...go on about your business. Trust me, when he's ready to talk to you, he will.
Put your focus on you and your children for now. Your kids need you now more than ever.

A 180 for you would be to leave him alone and treat him a "just a friend". You can't control him, you can't tell him what to do and you certainly can't snap him out of his crisis. The only person that you can control is YOU!

Go back and re-read what the posters have posted to you. The more you push, the more he's going to pull away...is that what you want? Be the lighthouse in the storm to him. Be someone he will want to talk to and spend time with. Be the person you were when he first met you.

Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.