Sad Dad needs help II

[MrBond]

"I know, but..."

See, here's the thing about communication. When you're trying to validate what someone is telling you, you NEVER say 'but'. That negates everything you just validated up to the 'but' word.

"the excuse tonight was she wasn't able to feed our D."

Then you feed your D and not allow your W to have her. No one told you to let her go hungry.

"Plus, as a Christian, I feel if someone's hungry and I can then I should feed them. Yes, I know, that's an excuse."

Yes it is. Here's what will happen. When she finds someone to help pay for her bills, do you think she's going to remember all of the Christian things you've done for her?

"Like I said earlier, I do good not contacting her."

From your postings, you do that out of fear. There's a difference between you doing that because you don't want to and are in a position of strength, but you do that out of fear for what she might do. So your idea of "doing good" isn't what you want to make yourself believe it is.

"But when I feel she has a legitimate need I try to help. Again, I've been doing this for over 25 years. It's hard to just hang her out to dry even though that's what she's doing to me."

God also gave people free will. She made the choice to leave. If you want to see her as the prodigal son, that's the way it is. She has to hit rock bottom in order to consider going back to her family. She isn't going to get there if you're always there with the net to catch her.