Infidelity/WAH, my story pt 5

[Surfer]

PsySara

All noted. You can be happy or right this is true. However, whilst you highlight your H's insecurities perhaps 'right fighting' may be a product of your own. I'd scratch death the surface a little more if we're you. I say this because my W is still 'right fighting' but much much less. MIL is big on this too. Why doe people do this do you think? Be honest because it's something I need to understand. Are they over competitive, insecure (hate it when people don't agree and validate) or something else or a combination?

My W used to say I did the 'out of sight out of mind' thing. To some degree this is true of course because when you're at work you're working you're not supposed to be sat thinking about you and your family all the time. Also, when you are having (non-wayward) fun elsewhere, why not have fun rather than dwelling on your partner etc). Again when my wife raIsed this I thought about it. I wondered if she felt that there wasn't enough affection, chasing or possibly control over me on her part. If I am honest I think this again has some foundation in insecurity. What do you think?

What I am trying to understand is whether there is some insecurity in this behaviour from my W - granted her sitch is different to yours but there are similar languages here.

BTW you seem a little better rested and I am pleased about that. I hope you are feeling better.

Surfer.