was or what 8

[roist]

Hi rouky. I appreciate the visit.You have a lot to offer others, but concentrate on you for now.

Journaling:

At lunch today I had forgotten that we had decided to use two new baskets in the xfboys bathroom instead of the existing one we currently use. I knew we bought two new ones and remembered looking for them with W on internet. I just forgot they were instead of and not as well as the other one. No biggie but W said she worries about me and asks if I don't worry too! I laughed it off and said I have a lot in my head and can't remember everything. I did the whole bathroom from scratch and worked out all the technical and logistical details so I will not stress too much :: about that. That being said I have noticed I have a harder time registering info in my brain. So she could be right. I didn't mention to her that I believed our situation is largely responsible for any such lapses. I am not dwelling on this as I assume once I get through this, and have less stress that will improve naturally.

I am not mentally where I want to be but I think I am doingok, considering. As ye may remember I was depressed before I started trying to save my M. I started treatment about two months previous. My W in one of our R chats (early on before I realised how gone she was and before DBing) she said we would see where things are when I was finished. She told me to concentrate on me first as trying to change to much at once was well too much. I never got back to her to say now that I am better let's fix us. (She really could be my DB coach ) She hasn't either! I knew it was just a delay tactic from her and I learned to not push it during that delay period.

Not sure why I posted all that but maybe I am wondering what she's wondering about me.I am.just wondering not dwelling and definitely not trying to figure her out fully.


OK end of my ramblings. Have a good weekend.
I intend to....