Sorry for your pain, I know how hard this is..It gets easier
Continue to take care of yourself..I think it helped me a lot in the beginning to just be there for my MLCER..like friends..Its hard, but I needed to do that for us- to see if it could be restored
The crises is hard because it is so sudden, and they do such a big switch from who they were..hard to understand, but because many of them seem to say the same things, we see patterns; we can see it is a crises and it follows a path
B4 they can recover, they need to get swept away..into replay.. This is where they seem so crazy and say all things to get out of the M irresponsible behavior, spending, addictions, affairs
Many leave, some return, yes we want them so much to stay and snap out but..they can't ,,,I heard others say its like being swept out to sea
It is not your fault..If it is a crises, it is hers , unfinished childhood issues may lead to MLC We can't fix them..only they can..many of them choose not to fix themselves instead they decide to play for a while..
We can support them as they go through everything they must We can create a new life, as we let them travel their road..being kind, cordial and caring At the same time, taking care of ourselves , the kids and our assets watching the spending and credit card bills-many of them spend far behind their means and have no sense for responsibility, even though they were financially responsible b4
Hard yes...but we get the benefit in the end and she may return... but it is on her timetable and in the mean time..we move forward, grieving, letting go and creating a stable environment for the kids and ourselves
married 14 years H 42 bomb 2/07 IDLYA D final 3 /09 M ow D ow
