Me and Midlife Wife and Midlife II

[CT1118]

Eric/AP - thank you for the replies. I do want to let MACH1 know I am still interested in his reply as well.

Eric, thank you for clarity on the arrows, I have wondered for a while and never got around to asking.

CT

I think if I try to answer that I would be mind reading, and I am trying my best to be a day at a time.

This ^^^^ one of the best things I have seen you post. Love it. Exactly what you should be doing. One day at a time….and no mind reading.

Thank you, and I did not even say it with any anticipation of pleasing my mentors

I would not have called this rescue. To me, I call it….going to make sure that you spend time with your son.

Yes, I would add not spending my time with him in the hospital for his hypothermia - I lost count of how many vehicles I saw wrecked/abandoned/flipped on that day with people standing around like "I can't believe my family sedan would not drive through 3 feet of overflowing swamp water".

IMO, I think was good on many levels. My only question/comment would be…. If you really did not have anything planned – then it is a tactic (still sometimes not a bad move).

So, this was good too, b/c I had just shared with a close friend this same day that I had bailed her out of a couple jams recently and I would not have if these jams did not posses the direct possibility of affecting my son's life towards the negative. Then later that day, I got to walk my talk. I did actually have something planned - I had planned to write a paper for a Graduate class which was due today, drink half a six pack, and then watch some HBO. I could have easily achieved the above after son was in bed, but, my son was not in trouble if I said no...so I did. She accepted my rejection cordially and without obvious disappointment or argument (something I may have received a couple of months ago). In all fairness to you via my answer, I have used a statement about having plans when I really didn't in the past, certainly as a tactic.

So like I said, I am not sure where her motivation comes from and while I do allow thought on it, this is far from obsession or salivation in her direction.

Great place to be.

Yes, but as a "compared to..." I had a very hard week - the last week. I was physically and mentally exhausted for many reasons. Some of them were my sitch, extreme GAL effort, but a whole lot were just work and how it has blown me up as of late. I hit a low in my efforts at life in general and felt very fed up; as in an "I am so GD tired" low, not a depressed low, it blurred my vision figuratively speaking. So why I caveat your comment - you are correct, I do feel where I am in this sitch of myself now vs my old self in indeed a great place to be...I cannot help but notice the ups and downs of where I am today still happen. However, they are different from before detachment.

Before detachment my ups and downs were emotional, needy, and generally just a sad reflection of the man I know myself to be. This period of me felt unrecoverable at times. Now, the downs, well, in short I do believe I am learning to accept the emotion, see it as natural, see it as normal, let it move through, know it will pass, and then get back to the positive progression after I let the engine cool.

As far as the Wrangler, I had a 2013 (was my second one – I had a 2009 too) 4 door with 33’s, brush bars, fog lights in the front and on the brush bar, light bar on the top and small lights on the side. It was black…all black…with nice black rims. I still miss it but I really do love the ride I get in the Grand Cherokee. I would like to see if future models have a bit more power….ya know….throw a Hemi in it.

Action speaks louder than words...in my opinion^^^^these are words.

You should get another jeep, you will miss it. I have an '06 with the stright 6 AMC engine, manual 6 speed transmission. Love driving that thing.

These ^^^^^ are actions.

(I hope you are getting my sense of humor at this point my friend, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery!) In all seriousness, I owned a '94 cherokee prior to two Wranglers and I beat that thing down on many a trail, she got up smiling each time - even when I hit a deer at 55mph, lost the radiator into the fan, and drove another 30 miles with the heat on full blast to vent the engine.

I had a 1998 Wrangler TJ. Lots of fun but it cost a fortune to maintain especially with the miles I drove. I never drove it aggressively off-road which was a shame. Not an issue for you people in the banana belt but it was nasty in the winter. Several times including once with an on-coming transport truck the rear skidded out on ice and I literally went spinning in doughnuts down the highway. Very scary stuff.

I had a '98 with a 4" lift prior to my current '06. It died a noble death after two consecutive weekends on the beach in Outer Banks, NC on sand trails followed by a weekend in West Virginia at my parents retirement land where I put it against granite and mud. A cylinder blew on the ride home, I drove the remaining 80 miles on three cylinders over blue highways smoking oil the whole way - got there and "pieced it out" on craigs list for 1/2 recovery of what I paid for it - only one Jeep.