Pink, I'm so glad you're still posting in here. I agree with job. The book is not finished. You and XH are still connected and what confuses me is that I don't know if you are keeping him at arm's length. It sounds like when he comes close, you hold your boundaries, which might be good for you if you are still afraid that he could hurt you again.
However, I am finding that piecing and reconciling are very risky and frightening and it makes us (me at least) very vulnerable. It's always risky to open yourself up like that, especially with someone who has hurt us so deeply and fundamentally. But if we aren't willing to take that risk, we won't get what we all wanted when we came here -- our M's back.
I took the leap and I'm so glad I did. Sometimes I still cry like a baby at the hurt and betrayal I felt. But I'm lucky. W takes me in her arms and helps me feel better when that happens. We just celebrated our 10th anniversary. I am so grateful I dared trust again, I dared being vulnerable again, and I dared loving her again -- that never really ended, though.
11/4/15 W revealed EA/2 months later became PA with co-worker Reconciling since late April 2016 Don't give up until it's time, then move on Be patient, strong and kind but never a doormat
