Hi AmyTx, I identify with everything you are saying and have done. The only was through this is through it, not round it, as we are constantly reminded.
If it is any consolation the message I try to think of when I get like this is the one where people say it would not matter what you had done, they were broken and this was going to happen.
All you can do is concentrate on yourself and try to improve you.
One day it will dawn upon him what he has done, and it is then that THEY will have to start doing the work instead of avoiding their shadow.
M 10, T 18 M: 36, W: 35, D: 8, S: 6 EA: Oct 12 ILYBINILWY: Jan 15 BD: Aug 15 Separated: Sep 15 Miss you: Jun 16 Aug 16: Dating (!) Oct 16: Selfishness returns... currently: disgusted