Had a great night last night. H is in study mode so I wasn't sure that he'd be up for it but I suggested a movie at our favorite "art house" cinema -- "The Philadelphia Story" which was funny and wry. H seemed very pleased that I had made the invite -- we grabbed sandwiches from a nearby store and ate them "on the stoop" outside the theater.

Before we left for the movie h showed me two suprises that he had mentioned earlier -- h told me that he had bought a new recliner (we had "inherited" one from his parents when they moved) so I went into the TV room and saw this wonderfully matched chair -- sat in it, etc. Told him that I really liked it BUT it turned out that it was the OLD recliner with a very cool slipcover on it -- what a riot! I love the attention and pride h is taking in making the house look good.

THEN he showed me the BIG surprise -- a beautiful telescope for us to stargaze with! h has always wanted one so now we've got one and bigtime plans to have him teach me all about the stars!

Anyway -- before the movies started h thanked me for being "the best wife" -- never one to pass up an opportunity for data, I asked him what made me such a great wife then offered "just list the top three things" .

He said:
My overall thoughtfulness
My sense of humor that keeps increasing and just cracks him up

AND

my enthusiasm for things

As an example for the last one he said that he loved how I was just very excited about the telescope and hadn't made any comments or showed signs of reservation about how much it had cost, whether it was practical, etc.

I told him that I knew that that hadn't always been true (it hasn't ) and that I was sorry for that.

He said he just really appreciated the fact that I trust him to not be irresponsible.

THAT is a direct result of me dropping the rope (feeling as though I always needed to CONTROL everything) and just letting h be -- well, and noting and appreciating all the great stuff he does.

WORDS -- that's what I got -- anybody else notice that???


Sage

Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.