I saw your reply - it was sort of moot since you have decided to give it some time.
It sounds like a very confusing time for you. I can see you have a lot of different moving parts to relate to, legally, practically and emotionally. Are you seeing an IC for yourself? I think it would be good for you to talk to someone and map out your options.
I get your urge to go to court and be honest about how you feel about your M. I'm a little surprised that for the insane amounts of money you are paying the L, you're not getting better information and preparation for the process. Did the L not tell you that you and WW needed to be there for this? I'm sure you're getting charged for the L's time, right?
M 16 yrs, WH62, P54 3 adult blended kids EA 11/13, BD1 6/14 PA fall 14, BD2 2/15 Piecing 2015, BD3 12/15 Separated 4/16 WH moved OW in 5/16 Divorced 6/15/17