Throughout your struggle even at the worst moments, your sense of humour was awesome. I may not have made it through all those threads without that!!! I smiled, smirked and sometimes laughed at your posts. You inspire me to want to be as good humoured. It undoubtedly helped you.
I sometimes wondered if I'd make it through all those threads too! It helps a bunch when we can laugh at this stuff. Impossible to do at first, but as time goes on you'll find ways.
Quote:
I have many questions but I will start with ONE. Only answer if you want to. Can you describe fully exactly where ye are at now?
Where am I at now? hmmmm…. To be honest, it's been a while since I've thought about it. I just try to enjoy each day and do the things I like. Be true to myself yet be present for my wife. (more than I was in the past) Realize my mistakes and shortcomings and try to be a better man, husband and friend. Work harder at seeing things from the perspective of others.
Worrying about my marriage is a thing of the past. I don’t think about leaving my wife or her leaving me. I doubt she does either. I firmly believe my wife and I are both fully committed to the marriage. We have each other’s back in so many ways. It's nice.
Our physical relationship has improved, and I expect this will continue.
I try not to hold things in, (that only hurts relationships in the long run) but I also won’t be uncaring or reckless about letting my feelings and desires known. You've probably seen some of my comments regarding STFU. I believe it has its place and time, and it's not always.
I try to look for the positives and focus on them.
Find ways to accept and be happy with “What is”, and move forward from there. Dream of what “could be” and set course for it. Don’t allow myself to be sidetracked by others.
A successful marriage can’t be a score card (I’m giving more than him/her!) or tit for tat. Often times the best way to receive is to give. There may be times when one partner is doing most of the work. This is ok. Michele has a section in her book where she explains it only takes one to tango. Maybe sign up for dance lessons!
M: A really long time. Crisis: 5 years. She's still worth it.
Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose. -Viktor Frankl
