... I've read DB 4 times. Spoke with a coach. And enrolled in LRT web program. I still feel lost. It still feels hopeless. .... Yesterday we even planned a little trip with the kids for later in the month but, then see she's searched for the attorney this am! I don't get it! Feels like an impossible battle.
Hi j20a00g, I am no expert - but just wanted to say hi.
Job has already shared Cadet's homework. Others will be better at directing you than I. However, I was VERY sorry to read how you feel above.
I think that since you feel so disheartened that you need to pay attention to you right now. You can't change her, but you can change you & your life a little.
Work on - GAL, detaching as mentioned. Concentrate on YOU & the kids. You will get there eventually. It's difficult to 'work against the grain' - work on you.
It took me a long time to detach, & a long time to feel a little hopeful. Although we (my H & I) are not legally separated, we are emotionally and physically so. (I had mentioned a separation but that went nowhere/will not 'hijack' your post).
The point is, that it will be 3 years for me in March 2017. Although I am still not yet completely 'out of the woods,' re 'mastery' of this entire experience, I feel better anyway. I no longer feel the way you do right now. At the time, I did not believe that I could ever feel better! Ever!
Read the homework. GAL. Detach. Keep posting here - & one day, you too will get past this stage. Just keep going.
Take care, p.
pbetra ---- M: 15 yrs (in 2014) BD: 6/03/2014 Infidelity ('known' from July 2014) Denied PA Feb 2015 2 leave Mar 2015 (left early Summer). Some contact. Back briefly 2017 (after family death) Separated 2017
Just keep going. 