New LBH with WAW/possibly WW, need help.

[nutts]

Hi Guys,

Thanks for the replies, and, doodler, this better not be a porn flick, or I've relapsed in my recovery!

I was wondering if I should tell her I knew about the EA. I was thinking about doing it tonight, but I guess I won't, not yet at least.

I've read a lot of stuff in here, so I've started trying to go down that path. I only broke down once and really cried in front of her, but I haven't done any begging or pleading.

I really want her to at least try and save our marriage, that's the thing that really bothers me. 11 years married, a son we both love dearly, and, she's not willing to try and save it. I don't know what she thinks will happen with this A, since he's so far away, and her family is here, but it definitely has me worried and hurts whenever I think about it.

She's a really nice and sweet person, always has been, and has tried to be nice to me through this, knowing how it hurts me. I know, sometime people change 180 when going through an A, and that might be her case, but I hope not.

You mentioned securing my financials; she doesn't have a job, but she does have her own CC in her name (although all money comes out of our bank account that my job deposits into). I'm not sure the right step there as I can't really cut her off completely.

It's really REALLY hard to work right now, hard to do anything, and I have to go home and act cool. I'll try, but I think I'll tell her how upset it makes me she isn't even willing to fight for our marriage any more.

Thanks.