Focus on Me and the Boys 9

[J5K]

Old Thread:

http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2708510&page=10

I think your idea of "tough love" really comes off as inconsistent and punishing. Tough love being a court battle when you are just going to give her what she wants was punishing. Should you be over accommodating? absolutely not. Sharing the boys clothes? That's for the boys.

She won't view it as punishing. She will view it as me being fiscally irresponsible and blame me for wasting all that money. Well she took most of my money, why can't she go buy clothes for the boys now? I am no longer her husband, where is her concern for them in order to clothe them as a single mother?

But I am still so confused. You want to tell her it's not your job to provide anymore even it's for the boys, yet you want to give her custody because you want to be able to provide for them?

Of course I will provide for the boys. I will give what is legally required if I flip the custody around. I guess I wasn't smart enough to see that all of this was a waste of time and money. Chalk it up to my misunderstanding of tough love or stubbornness.

Just think about it a little. It's like you are trying every action to prove a point, teach a lesson, or make her do something but they are so inconsistent.

I am not trying to compete, punish or teach a lesson. She has the freedom to do what she pleases whether I like it or not.