Detached, getting along better, but in limbo....

[Cherry]

You and your attention and affection are all they need. Last week when S was waiting outside the front door saying "daddy's gone", I sat down with him, then I started counting his toes and giving him cuddles, then he began giggling. They're kids at the end of the day, they need to feel loved, security and have affection.

That's a bit annoying, you're doing the right thing by not ignoring her calls. Show her the bigger person, take that moral high ground.

I think we probably will grief cycle. At least this is bothering us less, and we are able to still carry on with our day, and just accept that we are having a tough one. Funnily enough, my wh has no qualms with that, he has got full on changed from being naked even last week. He was in my room once and I got changed. He asked me did I not feel uncomfortable, I told him I hadn't even thought about it, and that was the truth, I honestly hadn't.

Yeah he does cycle, it's not really anger anymore. He realised that if he is yelling at me, I won't talk to him and tell me when he's calmer and then we can talk. Now, he just flip flops from following me around a bit and being super chirpy to just being silent and looking depressed. I said on my thread that I identified my early days of mood matching and realised that it was codependent behaviour, so I stopped. Now, regardless of his moods, I keep me the same consistent content, strong woman. That's a 180 I took, and the plus side is it really benefits your own mental health if you don't allow it to bother you. It truly is their journey and just highlights their own inner struggle.

You're welcome for the compliments, I'm seriously not just saying things, I'm not that kinda person to pay lip service. You genuinely do impress me at your strength and how you carry on being a great dad and putting the kids first.