One thing I would add to my earlier post (dang wish we could edit ;-) but particularly for the newbies here - as much as I wanted my W back when she left, and have since the day she left, I honestly don't think it would have been good for us - as there was much anger, hurt and resentment to even work on the relationship.

I would not have been in the right state of mind to work on our R in a healthy manner. This past 6 months has allowed me time to breath, accept what has happened and in some ways prepare myself for either reconciliation or moving on.

So if you're newly separated/BD - take the time and work on yourself - you will appreciate it down the road.

Me: 40 W: 45
T: 13, M: 11
1 D: 9

Suspect A 6/15
ILBINILWY 8/15, and 3/16
EA/PA Discovered 3/16
EA admitted 3/16
W Moved out 4/16
W opens R talk and says A over 1/17