Yeah it's like I reached a point where I have my limitations. I don't NEED her as I thought I did so desperately two years ago. I want her still...but I don't need her. The major difference being from two years ago that I felt I needed HDD to survive. Now I just don't care. Essentially, if she isn't contacting me ala Adele, repentant for the things she's done; like tossing our marriage away and wanting to talk possibly working things out...then contact at all is pointless. It's almost ridiculous to me that I even have anything to update this thread with nearly two years later because I certainly have done NOTHING to keep her lingering...she certainly has found a way to linger though...saying I'm on her mind and she thinks of me often blah blah blah. Action not words WAW because you don't have me by the _____s anymore. There's no connection... no ties... no kids...and therefore no reason for the intense involvement in my life. It's R talk or you don't exist to me. It's that simple.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Oh and although I didn't bother to address this with her...i didn't appreciate her little dig in her text to me when she said "one of your cute girlfriends"...that's the crap I'm talking about. How do you even know this information WAW??? It's just not natural two years after a divorce to care about your ex-husband, whom YOU left, and girls he hangs our with! It had nothing to do with Mom's death, the purpose of her text. It was a needless twinge of jealousy. Admit you messed up letting me go or stay down there in FL eating oranges under the palm trees with Mickey Mouse and leave me, your EX-HUSBAND, alone.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Hi Zeus, yes sir I am still around. I stopped by today to wish you all a Happy Holiday season. Still missing my WAW each and every day but never heard from her again after i gave her the cold shoulder back in March so I've had no updates at all. I know she was home visiting family for Thanksgiving but I never heard from her...Not that I expected to after brushing her off back in March. She probably figured I didn't want to see her and it's probably best that I didn't as the pain is still there even now almost 3 years after. So I remain in no contact.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Thank you Sandi...I hope so too. Happy Holidays to you.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Hi everyone, Just wanted to stop by and say hello and wish everyone well. No change at all on my end. Still in NC with WAW. As far as what's going on with her I know very little because I still follow the "no snooping" rule so I never have checked her FB page or anything. All I've heard was she was in a relationship that was very short lived and is now single again. Of course now as I approach the three year mark I doubt I'll ever hear from her again. Last March when our cat died was the last time I heard from her. I was in a ten month relationship with a girl I went to high school with until a couple days ago when I had to end things. So I'm a bit saddened over that as well but such is life. Happiness has eluded me since WAW left it seems. However seeing as so much time has gone by I guess WAW and I truly won't ever reconcile. Other than that there's not too much going on with me. I hope some of you had some reconciliations since I last visited. My best as always to you all!
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Wow. You said coming up on 3 years and I did a triple take. You're right. It is for both of us.
In some ways I feel like a lifetime has passed. In other ways it feels like it just happened. For me it seems like the divorce has still defined my world in so many ways. Who I am. What my life is like. My view of the world. The daily sense that things are permanently different than they used to be. Yet I have rebuilt my life too.
It's almost like I was secretly waiting for things to return to some sense of normality all of this time. It never did. But things are good now. In fact, if things changed from how they are today it would be tough to let go of this new normal. I know change is inevitable, that is why I savor each day as they come.
I don't think I'll ever understand divorce. Once something is replaced you can never have something that is irreplaceable. Even after this time I can't understand how that makes sense.
But I can understand that it isn't in my control, and I can understand how to focus on what it around me. That I can do. And that I have done. Things are good and I'm glad you are doing just as well.
Sorry to hear about your recent break up. You're a braver man than I for dipping your toe back in the water. I'm sure it's a reminder of what has been lost. But it's also a reminder of what may lie ahead. And again, the biggest reminder is what lies right now. Go out and play some pool. Spend a few hours working on shots off the end rail with some Led Zepplin playing. Always works for me...
Take care and thanks for the update.
Me:38 XW:38 T:11 years M:8 years Kids: S14, D11, D7 BD/Move out day: 6/17/14, D final Dec 15
Hey Zeus! Yes my friend I get every word you wrote. I still don't really understand what the hell happened three years ago. All I remember is devastation emotionally. Thinking three years ahead back then in 2014 seemed pointless. I didn't envsion anything. I was in such despair. Now looking back on those three years now that they've past...I've met so many new people...Men and women both. Some have came and went already... People my WAW never even met... Which at one time was a HUGE realization one night a year or so ago when I was out with friends. I was having such fun with all these people and when I looked around it hit me that here I am having fun with an entire group of people that it my WAW walked in she wouldn't know a soul. Then I remembered 2014...The year that will forever be tainted in my memory as the year my entire world, in every aspect, imploded around me...And how at that time I didn't have friends that WAW didn't know. So that hit me and was a "look at you now" moment for myself...Not the same guy who would come to this site in 2014 and read about others who had progressed years ahead of me and had lives. I was sure I would never live again.
So I totally get all you said Zeus. I am quite upset over this breakup recently because we pretty much lived together for 10 months... but really...After what I went through with WAW...This new pain and heartbreak over a new woman surely (hopefully) will wear off faster. Here I am...The dumper this time, and it still hurts. I should add that I was very tempted, for only like the 3rd time, to break no contact and send a text to WAW since it's been about a year. Nothing about relationships of course, I just mean a light-hearted " hey saw a car like yours at the light and thought of you...hope all's well" I decided against it...Why break it now...It's a rebound mentality I guess. Imagine that...WAW considered a rebound! But I digress, I did want to send a text though because I think NC has run it's course anyway and is no longer accomplishing anything...In other words...Do I really have anything to lose in the WAW department at this point? Anyway great to hear from you Zeus!!
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Hello all, I just stopped by to update my now-old story here and to wish everyone well as it has been a few months. I'm not even sure if anyone here remembers me anymore but those that may, hope you all are well. Kind of a worthy update...although I never heard from my WAW as of my previous posts I did learn that she has moved back from Florida. So she is living local again. I don't know if I will be contacted by her but she has already stopped into my work...not assuming, of course, it was specifically to look for me but she did show up there. I eventually reconciled with the girl I was lamenting in my previous post. Other than that nothing much is going on except for me being another year older! I hope any old pals I used to know here like Thorton, Zeus, Sandi, and all others are doing well and I hope friends who were divorced by a WAW around the same time as me a little over three years ago have possibly reconciled. My best to you all!
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
