Phase 2 contd.

[Pax_luv]

Please everyone accept my appreciation for all of your kind, logical, and thoughtful responses. How do people go through this experience without having the support that this forum provides?

I'm pretty even keel today. No tears.

Early this morning, I did a fundraiser with a girlfriend that I've known since I was 5. It was very uplifting. We supported a great cause and I was thankful for the distraction. My girlfriend gave me a good observation. While she knows I'm devastated about the d, she did say that it was nice to have the old Feyth back. She definitely noticed that I lost myself in the marriage. She said it wasn't a drastic difference, I just lost my funny and carefree personality. She even shared with her husband several years ago that she hoped I was truly happy because I wasn't myself and didnt necessarily seem happy. She told me today that she definitely sees a difference and sees me as being back and better than ever.
That was really nice to hear.

I got up so early and I have a bit of a headache so I've literally been lounging all day. I love the fact that stupid tv actually makes me Laugh out loud....finding silly things humorous is another welcome reintroduction to my life.

I've been thinking about the sitch and I think I feel lighter today. I don't have the fear and angst over getting the news that he filed and I was going to get served. It's over. It happened. I can stop worrying about it. It's a bit of a relief actually. Also, I feel like I can give myself permission to close the door and lock it. (Not just yet, but soon). I can't see any last ditch hail Mary's being passed from me.

So, that's it. Again, thank you all. It does feel nice to know I'm not alone in all this.