It’s like I now see H in a good light, just as he used to be before this disaster MLC. I don’t see anything bad in him. I see the person who didn’t know how to deal with life, who made mistakes, who didn’t really mean to hurt me, etc… Is that insane? What is wrong with me?
Nothing is wrong with you, Bright! You knew H really was a good partner all those years and that history hasn't changed. He is going through a really tough period right now. The vets tell us that it's not about us or the marriage, it's about them. And we can't fix 'em. (darn it all)
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I’m just trying to figure out what all these feelings mean to me. Am I delusional? I certainly don’t want to be in this for 12 years (like in the story bttrfly mentioned on her thread), but… Do I need to give it some more time??? Or, do I need to just cut everything off?
If you're getting itchy you owe it to him and your marriage to start letting him know. Dropping hints and truth darts. He needs to understand this is getting serious. Don't wait until you're triple done and drop your own bomb. Give him a chance to realize he's about to lose you.
M: A really long time. Crisis: 5 years. She's still worth it.
Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose. -Viktor Frankl
