I took my wedding ring off a couple of days ago as my wife took her off a few days ago. I did it mostly out of anger and frustration and the feeling that since my wife is behaving as if our marriage is over, I should too.
This morning I went to church thinking there was an 8am mass. I haven't been to church in ages but it has always given me a measure of comfort going so I figured why not. Apparently there isn't a Saturday morning mass so I had the church to myself. Quiet and dark. I sat and sobbed for a few minutes and then sat quietly. Something told me to go home and put my ring on and fight for this marriage even if my wife doesn't feel the same. I've given my struggle to God and I pray for his guidance. I feel like I'm in a car going at 100mph and there's no hands on the steering wheel. I need help.
I can see my wife is in some sort of haze. It's as if she's been given marching orders that only she can hear. I can only control my actions and reactions so I'll just have to hang on for dear life right now. So exhausting.
