When a WW sees or suspects one tiny step back from her H, she will do these type of things, b/c she wants him to stay where he is......which is attached to her.

It's crazy! She doesn't want to be his W, but she doesn't want him having anyone else to fill her position. She doesn't want to be M to him, but she wants all the benefits she had as his W. She will never admit this, but you can bet that is exactly what she will do. Even when the WW is living with OM, she expects her LBH to live his life around what she wants. The selfishness is staggering!

If you believed her show of affection were signs of her rethinking about the MR and you started getting all lovey-dovey, she would turn cold. Some WW's even have sex with the LBH, temp checking, and then the next day she is right back to her cold, angry, waywardness. Why? B/c she is satisfied that he is still attached.
The WW is not interested as long as the H is attached to the relationship/her. And, that is why I encourage H's of WW's to pull way back, to not be available, and to not be her BFF. Don't be fooled into thinking her bread crumbs are anything more than manipulation.

Your situation is not hopeless, but you cannot draw a WW by applying your nice-guy techniques. You have to be tough, b/c she has to have consequences due to her decisions. Her fantasy has to crumble. She has to go through a process, and the more you pursue, are available, cater to her, act like her BFF......the less chance (if any at all) to reconcile. She has to respect you before she is attracted to you. Not putting up with her b.s. is a big start.

It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!