Thank you bttrfly and Kat. You guys give me "hope" that I can get thru this. And find someone as great as you guys!
I am driving s15 to school this week. he's been fine. But I am staying on top of what he is studying at school. And when I brought up his studying metric conversions, he gets angry raises his voice and tells me his homework is done.
I smile. I know he is doing this bc he is in pain with a situation out of his control. I tell him gently that there is no reason to raise his voice with me. It calms him down this time.
Ok, one more weird thing. Last weekend I read our old love letters. I also went thru d22's adoption file I've kept (she was adopted from Delhi, India). I read the report that her birth mother was not going to let d22 live after she was born :o, but the doctor was the one who convinced her to put newborn d22 on the steps of an orphanage. The doctor said he did this bc the baby was so beautiful.
I see God's hand so clearly bringing her to our family. D22 is so special, and yes, I have made sure she knows this.
With this roil of emotions, I was watching a movie and I just started weeping. I haven't done this in a while. I hope these tears are tears of healing.
