Wow Twinmom that's great. I'm gonna use it. I can see how affair start. A brother of one of my friend (married) has been becoming close to me and it's making me feel uncomfortable. Big Red Flag! So I told him that I respect his wife and will not talk to him anymore. He says that we weren't doing noting wrong as we have known each other for a long time. I said true but when you share private info there is a big problem.
I'm proud of myself because I listened to my guts, I am lonely at times and have enjoyed talking to him but not to his wife's expense. Maybe being cheated on made me more sensitive, but I have always says I ain't getting involved with a married man, and I'm sticking to my values. I am feeling relieved because I know I have done the right thing, and it also proves what strength I have. I could have easily got involved with a married man. Yes I'm lonely and like his attention, but I'm not betraying my values. This shows that if you are an healthy person you can make the right decision.
I make me feel better comparing to my H's OW as I'm better than her ( i know I shouldn't talk down about people), because if she was healthy mentally she would have realised that what she was doing with my H was wrong. I do briber that if you want you can stop an affair happening, she didn't. In fact it says a lot about her and her values. If H is happy to have a woman who has no values nor self-respect, than they are probably a match made in heaven.
