Confused on What to Do 2

[Eagle11]

Ginger,

I understand what you are saying. Maybe I shouldn't say I didn't care. I cared about my W and I didn't want a divorce. I think what I was trying to say is I wish I could get the attitude back that if the M would be over I would be OK. 8 years ago I wasn't as scared at the prospect of losing my M like I am now. Back then I desperately was trying to save my M, but I had a totally different attitude than now.

I think I had apathy back then. I have no idea how I got there. I didn't read any books, I didn't know about DB, I did go to a therapist but it was a waste of time. I basically had the attitude that I was not going to give up on the M, but if it didn't work out I would be fine. It might have been just the place in life I was at the time. We had no kids and had been married for just over 3 years. Maybe I didn't have the investment in the M then that I have now so the prospect of losing the M is harder for me now.