Quote: She had to get back to work, but I just feel terrible and as if I'm probably going to be the ruin of things.
Hey...I'm really sorry this happened. And if it makes you feel any better, I probably would have felt just as hurt if I were you. And you know what? If the tables were turned, your WAW would have been hurt by it, too. Did you react like the most mature, upstanding man on the planet? No. But I also think it's wrong for her to call one stupid incident on your part "the final nail in the coffin." If she really thinks so, then she was probably just looking/waiting for you to turn into that "bad guy" she keeps wanting you to be. If it wasn't this, it would have been something else.
Remember our conversation about we mixed-up controlling women and how we don't think we deserve happiness and a nice guy? Doesn't this whole thing play right into that?
I'm so sorry that you are feeling sad about this rather than having the wonderful, communicative weekend with her I know you wanted. I hope and wish that your WAW would come to her senses, realize what a good guy you are and how much you love her, and get herself some C or whatever she needs to get through this so that you two can walk hand-in-hand together on the other side. And even if she "forgives" you for this incident, without her doing some serious soul-searching there will be another incident down the line that will be yet another "final nail in the coffin" as she puts it. And now we're back to you walking on eggshells all the time, and her controlling you with her anger, and a few years go by and you're feeling powerless and resentful again and...see where I'm going?
So, just hang in there for now, okay? The good thing about us controlling beotches is we usually know what control freaks we are, we do spend a lot of time blaming ourselves, and sometimes we even come to our senses before it's too late. Yes, I'll pray for you today, DBR, and for your WAW too.
P.S. I'm dying to know what you put under her door.
