Chapter 4 - Acting As If

[bigybiz]

This past weekend (Sunday) I hosted a birthday party for S16. 20 of his friends took over our backyard. It was great to see and be part of his life - even as the hired help!!

Earlier in the week W and I had some flare ups, the key learning for me was when she told me that S16 told her that he did not want her to come to the party. Further, when she asked if she could make his cake (W is an awesome baker), he told her "No thanks - Dad is doing it". FYI I've made 4 cakes in my life - all part of the recipe testing.

S16 took these actions for his own reasons ( I did not bring it up with him). It could be he did not want to create a conflict between W and I, it could be he was not wanting mom involved, it could be...

I'm hoping that this could be the kind of loss W will need to experience to become remorseful. S16 is gentle, soft spoken, thoughtful, etc. I know it would hurt me immensely if any of my kids told me that I could not be at their "Big Birthday" and I did not do all the work on the day they arrived.

I know to expect nothing, I'm not competing and I certainly know that my kids attitudes and opinions will weave back and forth, but it's still a shot in the arm.