How to rekindle love? (2)

[PsySara]

I have found using validation works well with just about everybody. Even my little ones respond when I simply say, you sound like you feel angry/sad/frustrated etc.,

I am pleased to read how well you are progressing in DBing, you should be proud of yourself. I find myself trying to unwind from co-dependent behavior. The ice cream vs. fudge thing was a very similar behavior that I used to do. I had to laugh because I bought a bunch of fudge the other day (ate all of it thankyouverymuch) for the first time in years because no one likes it but me in the house. I would have refrained from buying it before because it "was just for me" and that felt selfish. Now I am like, Give me All The Fudge! In our bonding we accidentally become enmeshed and that's not healthy.