Taking my first sip of the water

[Sotto]

Just to build on what Sandi posted. I read or heard something recently about events, the meaning we give to them and the pain we cause ourselves.

So, the basic event is - your W is going out. That's all it is - she will go out for an evening presumably with friends.

The meaning you give to it matters. If the meaning you ascribe is - she must be going out to meet a guy - oh she looks dressed up - that must be it. She could meet someone and kiss them tonight...maybe more....

You see how the meaning you layer upon the event starts to cause you pain? In your mind, you start to feel these things have actually happened almost.

So, recognise what the event is and also watch out for the meaning you start to give it. Because the event happened...ie: she went out. But your meaning didn't - that's just your mind working overtime due to fear, insecurity and so on.

Thinking like this can help the mind when it starts to go in unhelpful directions and rings a dose of reason and reality back into the mix.

Something to practice with those runaway thoughts going forwards perhaps? Good job with the GAL by the way xx