Sweet Jelly, the last thing you should do is compare yourself to another's experience. Firstly, there is no such thing as a "normal, fully functioning adult." We are all broken in our own ways. It's a part of being human. Just because you don't see it doesn't mean it isn't there. I couldn't tell you the number of times I've heard someone tell me how well it seemed like I was handling my situation when I was inwardly shaking my head and thinking, "if you only knew." In fact, when I was at my worst, that's when I was least likely to show it. We are all much more alike than we are different, and there is no shame in the struggle. We all struggle. It looks different for each of us, but the experience is universal.
I wish there were words to lift you up out of your pain, but I know there are not. Sometimes pain just has to be allowed to move through you. But you are never alone, and your friends here (myself included) will always be here to sit with you and hold your hand until the pain passes.
