WW Starting to talk again. Not sure if I want her.

[RosaLinda]

I think I am noticing one of my faults. It's that I tend to look for the worst. It's not a good trait. What I also do is use my great BS detector. It's rarely wrong. But if you spend enough time looking for a lie, you will find one too. I need to work out how to deal with this. There is a fine balance in being treated like a fool and setting yourself up for a fail - via an argument that didn't need to take place.

Also, there is a need not to give a sh!t. Okay, you are getting on together. Which is not bad - certainly for the kids. It's good. However, why give a sh!t what she is up to? I perhaps need to detach more and just do the okay - enjoy it thing!!

Did you ever hear the quote “If you look for the bad in mankind expecting to find it, you surely will"? Either Abraham Lincoln or Polly Anna said it, I'm not sure which. I think it's true, and always try to give everyone the benefit of the doubt and believe what they are saying....until they have proven to be big fat liars, then it's sort of hard to ever believe them again.

Nothing wrong with having a highly tuned BS detector. But you don't seem like the kind of guy who goes around looking for the worst. Were you always like this, or has the trusting part of your soul been kicked out of you one lie at a time?

You're right about needing to be more detached. It's great that you and your wife are being cordial, especially for your children. You'll get to the point where you don't care what she's up to one of these days. It takes time. Stop being so hard on yourself!