HalfTheMan & MLC-W

[HTM]

W reminds me yesterday evening of her upcoming week away for work in October while pinning up an itinerary on the kitchen notice board. Not sure why she thinks I need this as I remind her that I’m planning to take Ss away that week, pretty sure I’d mentioned this a while ago. Anyway, she inquires where I’m taking them and I say that I’m planning to hire an RV and do a little tour of Scotland. She looks at me, smiles and says “Why didn’t you ever plan anything like that before we were separated?” I reply “We’re not separated, we’re still married.” A slightly tense discussion ensues but I keep my cool and walk out of the room before it has a chance to escalate. It ends in a difference of opinion, she sees us as separated & I don’t, not until we’ve moved away/out anyway. Still can’t help thinking I could’ve handled this situation better though.

W seemed disappointed that my tennis practice got cancelled yesterday evening -genuinely- and I’d be around the house when she had an old work colleague coming over for supper/drinks. Of course, she wanted the house to herself, and in years previous I would of made myself scarce but I’m thinking she didn’t ask, just assumed I’d be out and this is my home too. W & friend were in the kitchen and I was in the lounge w/ S8 to help with his School reading. I then took him off to bed and returned to the lounge to watch TV -rerun of "Two and Half Men" my little comedy escape at the moment- for bit. When the TV programme finished (9:30pm) I was feeling restless and thought a session at the gym wouldn’t go amiss. I walk in to kitchen to grab my gym bottle & keys and found the kitchen door shut, probably so my W could bring 'quietly' bring her friend up to speed w/ the sitch. I made some polite conversation with the friend, whom I’ve known for some time too, then left.

Didn’t sleep well as I kept thinking about what W may have discussed with her friend the evening before. In the end got up at 5am, just before W gets up for work, and went downstairs for coffee. A short while later W comes down and I encounter the teenage MLCer mind. W’s complaining because she’d pencilled in a Thurs/Fri/Sat block of dates in the family calendar around her birthday. From a previous discussion I know she hadn’t confirmed all plans, certainly not for the Saturday. So I took the opportunity to book/undertake a course -GAL activity- that weekend, meaning she can’t stay overnight at a ‘friends’ because she’ll need to be home for Ss on Saturday morning. W then says she’ll go, and stay, out this Saturday instead which I see as her retaliating to my concrete plans. I did get drawn into some of the ensuing squabble, must try harder with detachment & holding my tongue, though did manage to validate a little. Eventually I saw where this was going, put my hand up and said “I’m done with this discussion.” W walked out of the room and went to get dressed for work. IMO another sign of teenage rebellion was what she was dressed in for the work day, a short flowery summer dress. In the past I’ve suggested this particular dress was worn for someone else. Didn't say anything this time but what amused me was here is someone wearing a summer dress when there was a thunderstorm & heavy rain outside I’m fairly confident she was trying to rile me, as later when I went into our bedroom something else had been laid out on the bed, more suitable for the days weather. I’m not going to bite this time though!