I think we've had conversations about communication before and not seen eye to eye, but I have to say that from over here, I don't think there was anything in the exchange that warranted the level of anger you seem to feel.
Extracting preschoolers from play dates often takes longer than you think, and when you are already running late and trying to text, it's not unusual to be terse, which can come off as bossy.
And expecting to be thanked for expressing best wishes for a surgery? It just feels like you are letting the larger situation cloud your perspective on exchanges that are rather benign.
Me: 44 H: 44 Kids: 20, 16, 16, and 10 Together/Married: 22 years H announced he was emotionally detached and considering D: 4/4/16 H announced he is going to try to stay and reconnect: 5/1/16