Well, I hafta admit this is not quite the kinda response I expected.
Update: Here I am working on Palm Sunday, when we are usually at the IL's have a wonderful homemade Italian feast. CAW has been feeling well due to a constant headache for over a week now (I finally was able to gently coax her to make a MD appointment for Monday which I will take her too, but that's another subject...), so she arranged to have D19 drive her to IL's. I just received a call from her. She's there ... she's missing me!! ... says she rather be Easter, because then she will be there at IL's with me. I can't remember the last time she called me to say she misses me...
... and I guess this is why I felt I needed to start this thread. After so many hot and cold cycles, I've gotten damn good at not reading too much into anything postive anymore as I don't want to get set up again for another downfall.
At the same token, there are some difference now, but is it different this time? How do I get to believe its different now? I would like nothing to be able to believe, but my version of crazymaking is constantly churning ... "This ain't gonna last!"
I guess maybe I need to hear a heart felt ILY. I havn't heard one of these in over a year! ... and then it was only to in response to when I said it first, so I stop saying then and I havn't heard one from her since. I don't even remember the last one was in which I thought she meant it.
However, she is back to doing other stuff that can be interpretted that way. She's takes my hand and craddles it with both of hers against her chest or she'll take her fingers and run them thru my chest hairs. (OK, I probably opened myself up to some jabs on that one?), etc... and so forth ... but these come and go with the hot & cold cycles (Geesh ... now I sound like we're a laundrymat!)
Like LL said, I just have to ride the wave, but how do I know if I'm riding the ultimate wave? I guess, what I'm struggling with is will I know this is the real deal? When I ever know? Is it just too soon to tell? Will I ever know?
Can she be approached with my doubts? How would I even take such an approach?
I feel like Charlie Brown does about the little redhead girl!
