My Wife Walked Out 6

[RSG]

Well, it's been a weird day. No communication until she sent a text while I was in counseling about when/where we were meeting for drop off. I mentioned I was just leaving counseling I said "hope you guys had fun." Then, when I arrived around 7 she was getting on me because he woke up at 4:30 and I didn't put him back down to sleep even though he has to wakeup at 6 so we can get going for school. We were talking while she was in the car, and in mid conversation turns, puts headphones in says "alright" and jets off.

So, after we got home I text and said "Was there a problem with him today?" expecting the freak out to be because he acted up or had a problem. Nope, just that he was tired and was still napping at 3 when she picked him up. She said why did you ask that, and I responded "I asked if you guys had fun and you didn't respond, and you seemed irritated at drop off." A few minutes later "He's in the newsletter." She said they had a good night just laughing and tickling, she wasn't agitated, asked me to kiss him goodnight and would check the newsletter. I said "OK, I will. Hope you had a good day." Nothing....

Very strange.

Counseling went well. She still thinks I'm doing well, and asked me what I thought my walls meant and what I could do to get them to come down. I told her I thought it was W job to get my walls down, because I had put them up to guard my feelings. I told her about what happened with the birthday weekend, and what that might mean. We came back to that when I mentioned she changes her hair color weekly, seems to change her narrative, and goes hot and cold periodically. Her woman's perspective was that it does sound like she's searching for something, but really hasn't figured out much if anything. She changes her hairstyle, because it's something she control and her moods are in such flux.

It sounds like my job right now, as difficult as it sounds, is to be a lighthouse. She just noted I need to try to be as patient as possible, because if I pry and probe too much while she's in this stage she may shut down or prematurely determine that I (and our family) ARE in fact why she's unhappy.

We talked about my boundaries, and she was very pleased with how I enforce them. Also, that my validation, listening and communication skills continue to improve and are becoming more natural.

I always come back from counseling in a good mood, but W was so weird tonight. Then, S had such a difficult time getting to bed....not feeling so great now. W is kind of indicating she doesn't want to talk, so I'm not going to push it. She's on her journey. My Mr Fix It is really coming out because I want to help, but I know that will likely end pushing her away.....