Albac - 7 months in. Life goes on.

[mulesqb]

I am working on me for me. I can say honestly that over the past 8 months as much as I said I was working on myself for me that I was not doing 100% for me. I was hoping to spark some change in her.

I promise you that all of us have done the same thing.

I can now truly say I have thrown the rope away. I don't care what she does now. I am not available to her at all. I am working towards a bright future where I am happy and my daughter is happy and has everything she needs.

Everyone has their own personal boundary. For me it was a confirmation of a PA. It was something I was very clear about and the one thing I stuck to my guns about.

As for OM I made it very clear to her that I NEVER want to meet him. And that we will never all be friends because that's not how life work. I said I know that we can't change our feelings and I want her to be happy.

Well done. Continue to be firm and leading.

Just before I left I said that I will be dropping contact for myself as seeing her is not good for me. She said she understood. The messages me about random crap the same night.

She really wants to keep you in the palm of her hand. I know you know better than to even acknowledge those texts.

I think she is a very lost soul. She says she wants OM and not me yet she tries to keep me as a best friend. She needs to get use to the fact that I want no part of being her friend. But that's not my problem.

I really think they don't know what they want. Something makes them unhappy and I think they know very well they are behaving atrociously and they are trying to keep everyone around while they try to figure it out. I also believe they are fully aware of all the collateral damage they are causing. But they can't stop. You have the perfect attitude. She needs a big dose of no-albac-in-her-life reality.

I know there are mixed opinions hereabout seeing other people. I am at a point now where my GAL and moving on with my life I need to start socializing with other people more including women.

I started to soon because my XW beat down my ego to nothing. I realized it was too soon. I stopped for a while and then picked back up when the time was right. And I knew when the time was right because I was truly ready. I knew I gave everything my best shot, and I had my kids in a great place

I'm not saying I'm looking for a relationship because I have no interest in that now but anything I can do that helps me fill time and feel better I think is a good thing.

Just be a fun, social albac. Doesn't have to be dating. Can start by just going out with friends and getting a new social outlook.

I'm proceeding with life as if my W is gone forever and I need to be ok with that otherwise I am just living in a prison. I have been in the prison of hope for 8 months and I can't live there anymore.

What if you just took her out of the equation in your thinking. Proceed with life because you're a good man, a good father and a good person and you deserve that.

I know it's hard. You have been through a lot. One day at a time. Find yourself. You can handle that.

Strength and Honor.

Mules