Papers are filed, here comes the D. Focus on me

[Cherry]

Had an opportunity to go visit family on mainland Spain this weekend, seriously considered it but the flight prices are absolutely ridiculous, and I've got an important meeting in work on Thursday. It's a possibility to do, but just feel it would be a lot of rushing for a couple nights and an awful lot of expense. Plus airlines charge the same price for a toddler as an adult. Criminal!
So that's a shame, it would have been nice to go, and s is learning Spanish so would have been a great chance to practice!
Plus with the sickness being unpredictable, it probably isn't feasible. Another time maybe.

Sat watching storms with S tonight, he didn't seem to know what to make of the lightening. I told him there's nothing to be scared of while mama's around. And that's true, I will protect him and always be there (god willing) for him.

Going to do my pamper tonight, got a meeting tomorrow with some big people at work so I need to appear bright eyed and not like I've been throwing up all day and night. I keep throwing myself forward into presentations and meetings with the big bosses- I feel like a different me comes out. I think I'd like to be her full time, she smiles, looks you in the eye and shakes your hand. I'm confident, and I feel proud of myself that a girl who's been living by herself and at one time working two jobs and studying at uni, is actually getting somewhere. I want to make myself proud, most importantly my son. I have a plan in place to return back from maternity and get back to work. I know there's a stigma in the uk of young single mothers, that it works out better to quit your job as you can get more benefits. Whilst that is possibly true (I can't qualify for some due to my job and working), and I'm not passing judgment on those that do that. But it's not for me. I like to purchase something and think I've worked damn hard for years to be able to buy this. And I want to set the example to my children that if you want nice things, or holidays or cars- you get up and go to work.

Tonight wh has come to check up on me, making chat and asking how I'm feeling. He's been spending the evening texting me asking random questions. Questions he could answer himself really. Little strange, when he is usually ignoring me. Still I shall not overthink.. I have some power on Netflix to catch up on!