Trying to detach - part deux

[Altair]

So Coly,
Here's my answer to your question. Until the lunch, I was feeling better about the no contact, definitely feeling indifference. Picturing the possibility of getting served papers in the mail and just thinking about how I was going to try to cope with all possible outcomes. Like you, not much crying or despair, just a quiet, firm resolve to do the best I could.
Well, seeing him, talking to him just blew all of that up. A LOT of love rose to the surface (hence, tears), a lot of Uh oh should I be doing this? And then of course he says, "see, this is what I was afraid of, having lunch with you." So don't forget, you are still on a roller coaster, you just happen to be at that slow spot before the spiraling turns.