And, without all of the gory details... the current timeline beginning with the first period where I sensed exW was depressed or going through something (before BD):
Summer 2013 -- stressful, W sometimes distant (prior to this we had 8 wonderful, but busy years together building a life and family with 3 amazing children)
Christmas 2013 -- very happy, spent with family out of state, W very affectionate and loving
March 2014 -- our 9th anniversary - loving, happy, but different/slightly distant
May 2014 -- W's step-mom dies suddenly and unexpectedly, major shock to entire family
Summer 2014 -- stressful, lots of travel (vacation to Disney with kids, out of town trip to visit family, beach vacation with family later in the summer), W very distant at times, one of our dogs starts having major problems (related to age)
August 2014 -- discussion about "us" but resulted in reconnecting and having a great week before school started, W much more affectionate and loving and invested in "us"
September 2014 -- W begins online communication with person who would become OW, our R still good and W doing little things that kept me thinking everything was fine/continuing to improve
October 2014 -- a couple of very fun "date nights" together, online comm with OW continuing but just "friendly", even I comm with OW in friendly way, near end of month I start to notice that W and OW comm is excessive in frequency
Last weekend of October 2014 -- W goes away for annual girls' weekend with college friends, I snoop and discover the W comms with OW more that weekend than she does with me
After that weekend -- I confront W about her distance towards me, results in big blow up and I see texts/emails between W and OW where W confides that she is unsure about "us" and begins to express her feelings toward OW
First week of November 2014 -- I realize everything, this is BD week, my nervous breakdown begins
Mid-December 2014 -- W gives me the ILYBINILWY talk and says "it's over" -- no interest in working on M/R
Christmas 2014 -- sucked
February 2015 -- W makes week and half trip to visit OW out of the country, tells me that she was going away for a "silent retreat" but I knew the truth
April 2015 -- I get new full-time job
June 2015 -- I move out
June 2015 -- OW comes to visit for 2 weeks
September 2015 -- exW goes out of country for 2 weeks to visit OW again
December 2015 -- OW moves here, they get married right before Christmas, I start dating old friend
March 2016 -- I start going back to IC
August 2016 -- we learn that exW's brother and his H are separating due to H's drinking and infidelity -- this is big because bro & his H were one of the examples of a "perfect" couple that W often referred to when explaining to OW how/why she is unsure about "us"
September 2016 -- exW suddenly unfriends me and my family from FB, my GF and I begin discussing ending our R (various reasons)
So this is where it all stands right now... I am definitely still in the middle of the storm and continuing to try to work on me. Getting involved with old friend was fun, but I think it did 2 things -- 1. Distracted me from my journey and 2. Opened my eyes to some things about myself that I needed to see in order to continue on my journey (so I believe it has served a purpose in this middle of all of this.)
Me 48, Her 50 (Same-Sex Couple) 3 Children Together: 9.5 years before BD BD: Week of 10/27/14 ExW started EA w OW 9/2014 ExW married OW 12/2015
