Divorce. Thanks Obama

[Surfer]

QT

All of us did what you did, to a greater or lesser extent. Being selfish with time, saying insensitive things (often due to ignoring them and blurting out what you 'feel' as such), not wanting to spend time with her friends (they are hers not yours after all; I really don't like some of my W friends, she has some lovely friends but the ones she hangs with now are WW themselves, they just don't see it) - in short did it and get it all. Even the fitness time at the gym - for me (only did one marathon - not really built for it, too much of a mesomorph, rubbish time but enjoyed it).

Many of us also did the drug thing. With me it is binge drinking. I go out and I will drink a few pints rather than one or two. Don't get me wrong, I don't drink 20 pints or a bottle of spirit etc but it is not good. A habit that stems from a long history of binge drinking at university then as a young professional, it's rife in society. So as you say, either pack it in or cut down, change your habits. That's one of my goals. Tricky though when GAL, most of my social life, revolves around drinks - yesterday drinks, tonight birthday drinks and a meal...don't get me wrong, I'm not the guy that's an embarrassment who throws up or is all over the place. In fact I can handle it very well. But I know it's not good. I did have a few glasses of wine on a night when we were living together and while it relaxed me my W did not want one so perhaps it made my W feel detached. I regret that - a little but I am human and normal so I don't stress too much over it. Just something I need to be aware of and work on. I also don't really believe in being 'an addict'. I believe in bad habits. We are defined by them. Change the habit, change the man.

So, in short, I am not seeing one thing you need to beat yourself up about. I am seeing some great opportunities to look at yourself though and some very definable goals - a gift my friend!!! Be the best version of QT....you know the drill.

Surfer.