Mighty! So glad to hear you moved! I never regretted moving 45 minutes away, it feels great to know I'll never accidentally bump into my ex. (I did see him a year ago when helping middle son move; I didn't recognize him at first when he drove up ..... He just looked like some old white guy. My Tall Dark and Handsome boyfriend was helping us: apparently when I was out of the room TDH thanked my ex for divorcing me and told my ex that I was the best woman he'd ever met! )
I bet your D15 is happy with the move, it sounded like it was so tough on her with kids at school knowing the whole drama.
My youngest hasn't spoken to his dad in almost a year. My ex probably thinks I have something to do with it, but no. I've always tried to put a positive spin on ex's behavior and encourage a compassionate view - but youngest son sees ex for who he is and has a right to his opinion. He hopes to reconcile someday but feels his life is more peaceful right now without his dad's negativity in it.
I always felt like your H got trapped, and is doing his very long penance. Still he didn't have to neglect your own kids in the process of raising his new one; that's the part that really has repercussions.
My ex, on the other hand, went off in search of his MLC rewind. He met and married a woman 18 years younger, bought a duplex at the beach and lived his surfer paradise, partied with her thirty-something friends, etc. But reality has caught up; in the last year his wife's mom died unexpectedly, her father developed dementia, came to live with them, then they shipped him to her brother. Then promptly my ex's father was diagnosed with lung cancer, has just finished chemo. A lot of ugly reality and mortality intruding on that fantasy of pretending he was thirty again.
I'm glad you moved, I'm glad your kids are doing better, and I hope your NG is treating you like the princess you are. Xox
