May Divorce Be With You

[qt4x11]

In the end I've found I not only have to grieve for the marriage I lost, but for my idea that I'd ever have a relationship that worked the way I used to believe they could. That is a lot to accept which is why I, too, am not looking for a partner.

you'll be devastated at the pointlessness and profoundness of this loss for many years if not all your life and you may never feel the naive trusting love you felt again

That's why I feel like I'm a broken man now, I'm damaged goods.

Oh, and my son who is 12 and is a coding prodigy, I got him hooked up with a pal over the weekend that helped him install visual studio, and gave him a tour along with showing him some stuff that I know will help him on his journey.

Certainly Eclipse and XCode have a lot of problems, but Visual Studio really takes the cake. What is the deal with those floating windows for everything? If he's coding in anything other than the C# .NET Microsoft type languages, he should just use Atom or something. But yeah 12 years old and already getting serious about this stuff - it's pretty inspiring and he definitely is off to a great start.

I compare it to losing your arms in a crash or something. They won't grow back, and I have disdain for people that act like divorce is a growth opportunity that's all for the best. Let's call a spade a spade.

I can already see how I'll probably become a wiser and more compassionate and open person from this situation. And I have the time now to fulfill some life goals. That's some consolation.

I'd still trade all the 'personal growth' in the world to be able to go back in time and fix my relationship before it exploded.

Man, you're doing awesome. You don't feel it yet but you couldn't be doing any more

I don't feel awesome, I'm still pretty much struggling, but thanks. I'm just trying to take care of myself, for my kids more than anything.