Roads Go Ever On

[Painter]

Wonka, I agree. Abuse is slow and escalating and you get used it while it happens, like water slowly warming. It's sometimes difficult to recognize or label when you're in the middle of it.

Don, besides that, I agree with you. I think WH feels a certain degree of contempt towards me because I took him back after finding out about the A. He said when we married that he needed 'someone to keep him straight'. I told him I wanted a partner who could keep himself straight and I hoped he wouldn't put that on me.

I meant he could perceive it that way. If Ow is gone you may not counterfile.Just how HE may interprete the OW statement. Don't worry about that too much. It is done and he will: interpret things his own way regardless.It was just an outsider view that could help in future.

Roist, I see what you mean now. My statement was just meant to be a fact of the law - not that I wouldn't file at-fault if she moved out, but that I (at least I think) can't if she doesn't live there. But he may not have taken it that way, he may have interpreted it the way you describe. Thanks for pointing that out!

Cherry, I have sooo much evidence. And our state laws even considers it a misdemeanor that she's living there now. It's the same there, she'll be named and may be called in to make a statement.

You know a funny thing? He said early on that part of why he married me, was because he wanted a wife who could be a great role model for his daughter. And I took it as a compliment... I guess now when she's all grown up, he doesn't need me anymore.

Phoebe, I hope you're GAL'ing like crazy in a good way!
I'm experiencing an interesting indifference today. I can think about WH and OW and it doesn't really affect or hurt me at all. Probably won't last, but I'm enjoying it for now and realizing it means it's eventually going to be that way.

I said to my IC last week that I am getting a little tired and annoyed at how WH is dominating my thoughts, and she said that was a GREAT sign. I recognize the feeling from right before I stopped crying for 3 hours every night - I was getting bored and exasperated with it.

Had a lovely lunch with a newish friend today that ended up as a 4 hour conversation! It didn't feel that long. Her D was final in the spring, after a year - they share two young children, so she's quite a bit younger than me but we connect so well.

Zues, I actually wasn't the least bit angry or spewing - he was the angry and spewing one. It doesn't have to be a two-way argument with him, he can fly into a rage all by himself. I guess it sounds like we were arguing based on him reacting that way and hanging up on me, but the anger was all on his end. I trained myself years ago to be completely non-emotional with him to try to not escalate the daily rage.