Roads Go Ever On

[Painter]

It was hilarious that he walked right into that one himself. Sometimes his anger makes him say truths he didn't mean to reveal.

I mentioned OW moving out as an option that is open to him because that would be the only way he could remove the grounds for an at-fault D. I wanted to make it clear to him that we both know he has a choice and is not a helpless victim. Actually, I thought it was very non-controlling by putting the ball completely in his court. It's interesting that you perceive it as controlling.

He usually acts as if things just happen to him, that he has no say in what goes on in his life and he's just a victim of circumstances. He could easily have pretended to not understand that he had the option of moving OW out of our home until the D was final. He just doesn't want to live the consequences of his choices, so he tries to pretend he doesn't have any.

I know that come court time, I will have to explain this to the stepkids as well. They will not see that he has the option to *not* engage in adultery to protect himself legally. It's supposed to be our job to insulate him from anything bad happening to him, regardless how he behaves. I'm probably the first person in his life to hold him responsible for his actions and it's making him furious.