Confused on What to Do

[HaWho]

In my opinion, this is where you need to keep yourself squeaky clean.

She will not want to deal with her baggage so she will for sure project. She will go through your computers and personal stuff hoping she can find anything to deflect to you so she feels better about herself. (Clean up your personal papers, too.)

Before my h told me he wanted to sleep with other people he accused me of having an affair while I was out playing tennis. It was insane. I told him he could come 3 miles down the road and watch my playing on the court. It is written that they do think we are doing and thinking as they do. I have seem that countless times.

Also, if she can't find something, be prepared for her to start fights. That is what my h did after he couldn't find any dirt on me. With Job's help I realized he was trying to make himself feel better by getting me to get into the mud with him. If I became argumentive, well, then I was continuing to be the problem!

Keep yourself squeaky clean with a PMA and don't engage! In fact, try killing her with kindness and see what happens. That stopped all my h's argumentative antics, though it took time! He pushed every button. I think if you're squeaky clean, this forces them to have to deal with the fact that you are not the problem. (Though it'll take loads of time and they'll look for other band-aids.)