Issues I have: 1) Do I need all the details regards when are we're the had sex? Is this making things better or worse. 2) I have a lot of angry which can lead to negative comments to W, how should I deal with this? 3) Trust, can I live with the knowledge this can happen again in 2, 5, 10 years! 4) How do I not look at my beautiful W and not think of her as tainted!
1. You have a right to know what occurred but be careful not to ask about the gory details. Knowing every single detail won't help you heal. 2. You have every right to feel angry but be careful not to lash out at your wife. Remember, you are trying to heal your M so that you can live a long happy life together. Dont say things to her now that you will later regret. I recommend journaling if you need to vent. Or come here and say the angry words you have rolling around your mind. 3. None of us are guaranteed anything at all. She could cheat again but so could a new spouse. 4. I think these goes away with time. All of this is still fresh and very painful. With time, the memory will still be there but it will not evoke the same painful response that it does now.
Me: 48 y/o W: 47 y/o Together: > 20 yrs BD: Dec '15, then S 2nd BD: Mar '16, then I filed for D April '16: started piecing
