I need to see if I can do it. I focus on her issues a lot, but where do MY issues start? Can I even go dim at this point, or will I invent some stupid excuse to contact her? I want to see. She's told me she needs space that I can't usually give her because, unless I'm GALing, I'm at home trying to soak up as much kid time as I can before she blows it all up. Well, this is almost 2,000 miles of space for 4-5 days, and she'll have it if I can sack up and not be a girly man trying to call her and text her.
FWIW, I think this sounds like a man being painfully honest with himself. I don't think you are a girly-man.....(lol) I think you are a good man who honestly was doing what you thought a H in your situation should do. I believe you are ready to DB, now, b/c you are discovering what you always thought about husband-wife relationships.....may not be how it works for your MR. A lot of H's and fathers are in the boat with you. I suspect it is somewhat scary, for some, to consider getting outside their comfort area.
I can't remember if I told you. I married a man who had super NGS. I mean, they just didn't come any sweeter than my guy! However, along with his sweetness, came passivity, conflict avoidance (and the whole list). What I thought was sweet about him, before we married......became the very thing I hated about him. And, I have seen the same thing played out over & over again in the stories here. What we think we see in our future spouse....may not be the complete picture. Someone once said that in most M's, there is one spouse who does most of the giving.....and the other spouse who does most of the taking. I think that becomes the case in the stories we read on these forums. It's not 50/50, like some us were led to believe. It "should" be, but when it's not, you have the giver and the taker. I will readily admit I was the spouse that did most of the taking......b/c after all, I was married to a man who had NGS. Well, guess what? I have learned, first hand, that men with NGS can change, and it doesn't stop them from being a good man.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
b/c you are discovering what you always thought about husband-wife relationships.....may not be how it works for your MR. A lot of H's and fathers are in the boat with you. I suspect it is somewhat scary, for some, to consider getting outside their comfort area. 
