I am just really struggling to commit to any approach to this sitch. I know there is nothing to "fix" and nothing I can do to change how she feels.
The thing the confuses me is trying to keep the door open without being walked all over. My W has never been angry aggressive or mean once since she left. She told me she was seeing someone else and definitely does not see how as an affair she sees it as in her mind we were done and his is her moving on.
I enjoy the encounters we both have all the time until I remember she is seeing someone else. She wants to have me available as her family when she wants it and the single life the rest of the time. I just don't think I can do it this way anymore. Doesn't mean I'm closing doors or folding on my M it means instead of pretending it's all good I am going to stand up for myself and start telling her no when I don't want things the way she does. My W is off the planet at the moment she asked me yesterday to go on a holiday to Europe with her and my D like it is perfectly normal. I also don't think the OM would be happy about the things she talks to me about and PT.
I was getting a leg cramp the other day after gym while she was here and she gave me a leg massage. My head was screaming say no but my head lost the battle. And in the end I am just left feeling like a toy she can throw away when she's finished.
Anyway point is I'm not pushing for D I'm pushing for not caring about what happens and not reacting to what she does. If I can get there I will be much better off.
ME- 31 W-25 T-5 M-3 D2 ILYBNILWY and moved out - FEB16 W seeing someone else - JUL16
