I guess I am still just trying to figure out if I should tell her all that I know and if I do how should I tell her? That's my problem right now. I know that if I keep my mouth shut the EA/PA will just continue and that will be worse. I also know that it will drive me crazy knowing this "secret" and not doing anything about it.
Eagle11,
I understand what you're saying, and I'm not a vet or a DB expert, so don't act on anything I say without getting the opinion of others. After going through this process first-hand, there's no way I'd keep my knowledge of my WW's affair a secret. I'd confront her with the facts and cut her loose (i.e. boot her out the door). And, I would never tolerate that kind of behavior again.
You have every right to see the phone records and she's the one having the affair. You're not the one to be worried or afraid. The onus is on her and her boyfriend; I wouldn't hesitate to put the fear into them and anyone in their wake. But, that's the current doodler. Maybe the more docile crowd would have a different and better approach. However, being a doormat really pisses me off and the fact that I allowed myself to be a doormat makes me want to puke. Never again!
Again, I could be very wrong in my approach, and maybe I'm a bubble off center, but I'm not going to tolerate infidelity just because my wife is going through a rough patch.
