Keep Wearing Wedding Band? [Thread #3]

[Surfer]

FG,

Looked back at your sitch. Sorry - it's horrible, I know.

This is how I see it. You are making a lot of contact and it doesn't seem that productive - it's stressing you out and you are not getting on. You are just beating each other up. Are you doing 'more of the same?' Go darker - from her, not the kids, and GAL. Try something different. If you keep being there for her to spew at she will. Stop being there for that.

Let's face it. Most of us on here will have to face the painful reality that our WS's are not really who we want them to be or who we even thought they were and we may never have our old partners back (if we ever had them).You R may come to an end. The sooner this is accepted the better. Anything that happens in terms of a successful reconciliation with a fog free spouse is a bonus. Look people drop off this forum. They don't stay here for ever. They either reconcile or move on. You will do one or the other. So will I.

However, is it really that painful all of this? What is causing your pain - you! Stop giving a sh!t as much as possible. Look at it this way, our spouses have fuok all in terms of morals - that is pretty clear. They only think of themselves and justify a bucket load of BS (which causes terrible pain for many) in terms of re-writing history, you name it. No morals and a liar - I am defining the character traits of someone you are begging to love you! I am going to do something productive with this thought on my thread. Pop over and contribute if you feel up to it perhaps?

As for the paperwork - you can always tell her it's her journey.

Just thoughts.

Surfer.