Don't know what to do

[stacey9]

Hi Maybell I have been thinking about your questions for a while now and I really don't know what it is I want exactly. I look at you, Sunny and others who have moved over to this forum and although I am reasonably content with my life I am clearly not in the same place you are.

I think what I look forward to is a time when it doesn't sting when the kids go to dinner with H and OW. Does it hurt more because I'm still on my own while they play happy families? Would I feel differently if I had a partner? I would like to be able to see and speak to H and have no feelings at all. I'm confused by his recent actions and I've recently heard that him and OW are buying a place together. He's now in a hurry to to get things moving with the marital home. Again.

I would like everything to be finalised maybe closure is what's needed here. I work full time, I exercise every day, I go out with friends at the weekend. I'm busy and I'm getting by, but I still miss him. Years later, I miss his laugh, his sense of fun, his touch. I'm being honest here. I'm living my life but if I could choose I'd much prefer if he was still in it.

I know I will be more than fine without him - maybe I'm just having a sad day , whatever it is I know it'll all be okay in the end. It always is.